The titans of our time go head-to-head. Only one will emerge victorious.

Today:
The Rogue Prions That Cause Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy
v.
Ebola Reston

T.R.P.T.C.B.S.E. E.R. Eat cow brains, causing said cows to fall down. Turns monkey innards to mush, causing said monkeys to hemmorhage. Are neither bacteria nor viruses nor fungi nor parasites. Are angry proteins. Is wicked angry virus. England. Africa, re-located to Washington D.C. May cause insanity, death in people who eat meat of affected cattle. Harmless to humans, at least in current model year. ... But may turn on Homo sapiens at any time, so watch your step, bucko. Transmitted by using brains of affected sheep as cattle feed. Transmitted through the air, on the wings of a breeze. "Mad Cow Disease" "Meltin' Innards" Provoke large-scale slaughter & burn operations, which restore consumer confidence. Provokes dispatch of space-suited SWAT teams, who lock contaminated research lab, then rub palms together & declare "My work is done here." "Scrapie" "Black Rushes o' Vomit" Best treatment: feeding cows hay. Best treatment: not mowing the rainforest. Winner: E.R., because it is not from England.

Next on All Star Face Off: Kohlrabi v. Television.